Another Milestone In My Career….Urk

February 21, 2009 at 6:30 pm 8 comments

Let me give you some back story first. The lovely ladies of Yosemite Romance Writers, asked me eons ago if I’d do a workshop. Now the caveat was, I’d do the workshop if they needed someone to fill in for a month. They’d let me know ahead of time so I could prepare. Since I am a member of this chapter I knew how awesome these ladies were.  On any given occassion they could find someone more authoratative than me. To be honest a newbie who wrote their first novel two weeks prior to doing a workshop, could be more authoratative than I.

Let’s fast forward to the beginning of February. I get a call and these words changed my life. “Are you ready to do the workshop?”

$%*#@, What?, is my internal reaction. Then I remember what I agreed to those eons ago and say, “It’s been crazy I’ll start getting some stuff together.”  I tried to keep the utter panic out of my voice, but I think it’s leak through in my e-mails. “You’ll do fine” is there mantra.

I digress.

So, the next step of course is denial. This lovely, intelligent woman would realize who she asked to do a workshop and bow out. She would realize she’s asking ME, Melissa, Nerd of the Century, to do a workshop.  And, then I saw the Flyer for the month of February: “YRW’s Speaker for February 2009, Fresno’s own Melissa Blue.”

So, now there is no backing out on her part or mine. She’s told people. Lots of people. These people have paid money to hear me speak. Like I know what the hell I’m talking about. They are coming with the intentions that I’m this smart, intelligent woman who has it together.

 Oh. Dear. God.

Right now it’s about to turn 9:00 my time. I have 4 hours to get my face out of this brown paper bag and speak. Thankfully, I got my act somewhat together and have notes. The talk still might last 5 minutes ’cause being nervous makes me talk like I’ve had 50 cups of coffee.

Now, you ask, why did I post?

I need moral support even if it’s through the internet.  I really can’t call these smart and lovely ladies of my chapter freaking out. I’m still trying to fool them that I’m sane-ish. Oh. Dear. God. I’m doing a workshop.


Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

Dear Morning, I Did Say the Year of the Writer

8 Comments Add your own

  • 1. coffeegirl88  |  February 21, 2009 at 7:20 pm

    You’ll be great! Just remember to breath and slow down the speed talk (yeah I know easier said than done but I do the same thing).

  • 2. Melissa Blue  |  February 21, 2009 at 8:24 pm

    Thanks, Cynthia. I know breath, don’t pass out, breath, don’t hyperventilate.

    Yeah, easier said than done.

    But I did call in the reinforcements–my Dad. He’s been a minister as long as I lived. He’s had to stand up in front of A LOT of people and talk and make sense and not pass out. Plus, he’s a fabulous sales man outside of being a preacher. He gave me some tips and the best one “Don’t look at anybody. Nobody!”

  • 3. kristy  |  February 21, 2009 at 10:20 pm

    WOW…that’s cool. How come you didn’t tell me you know would have gone for moral support. I know you will do fine you are a great speaker. GOOD LUCK.

  • 4. Melissa Blue  |  February 22, 2009 at 1:51 am

    Hell, I couldn’t think past “I’m going to have to speak in public” to ask anyone to go with me. You would have been so proud. I didn’t faint.

  • 5. kristy  |  February 22, 2009 at 4:14 am

    good job knew you could it.

  • 6. Edie  |  February 22, 2009 at 6:15 am

    I bet you did a great job!

    And congrats on your entry in Karin’s contest. It’s one of my favorites! I hope you make it to the last five. 🙂

  • 7. Raine  |  February 22, 2009 at 7:25 pm

    No worries.
    YOU KIN DU EET!!!!
    You are Melissa Blue. You are smart, witty, a part-time Chica and kick-ass author of kick-ass romance.
    Deep breaths, remember they’re just people to, take your time and have lots of chocolate waiting for your return home. 🙂

  • 8. Linda Ciletti  |  March 1, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    Ha ha! It all sounds so familiar. I would rather have gum surgery (and believe me, I have, and it hurts) than do a public presentation. Yet somehow, I constantly find myself put into that very situation. I’ve been volunteered to be on several panels and to do a 50 minute presentation on historical writing. (What the heck do I know about historical writing!!! Just because I write historical characters doesn’t make me a pro.) Can you say hyperventilate? For months before the horrifying event, I’m a nervous wreck. I sweat. I can’t breath. I have heart palpitations. I toy with the idea of backing out…cancelling…killing myself, or at least maiming myself so I don’t have to go through with it. My friends assure me…”your’e smart, you’re informed, you’re entertaining…yadda yadda yadda). But I know the truth. I’m terrified! I’m not near as informed as they believe. But I love them for believing it. Regardless, somehow my sense of responsibility refuses to let me cower out and I take the plunge. Funnily (is it a word?) I pull it off. And I pull it off well. Afterward, I feel strong, accomplished, like I could do anything! Even go through gum surgery without anesthesia. That is until the next time I’m asked to speak in public. Then the process starts all over again!

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