Tapping Into the Honest Part of Me, Part Tres

January 12, 2009 at 5:06 am Leave a comment

So, after all this time it dawned on me, I want to write fluff when it comes to my contemporary romance.  Well, fluff that covers up deep issues. I want to pull in my reader with the laughter and do an upper-cut with emotions. I want to write books heavy with dialogue, but when I write that stuff in between I don’t want it to just be window dressing.

Basically I want to be a romance author. Who writes the funny well. Writing funny is hard as hell. For me at least I have to be in a dark mood to get the snark just right. Again, for me, when times get rough I don’t get woe is me, I get funny as hell. Make you pee in your pants funny. I want my writing to be funnier than me in real life. I seem to can’t get past that I need to be open when I write. Literally, I put up a guard when I sit down to write.  It’s thin, but it’s there. And that thin barrier keeps me from writing the things that are truly funny.  I second guess the spur of the moment funny, poignant, life-changing for myself and the character. All for fear that the reader won’t like it. That the true me will be rejected.

Now if that’s not honest I don’t know what. I’m finally getting to the point in my life where I’m liking the me I’ve turned out to be.  I’m pretty cynical, nit-picky , it takes a lot to impress ME. So why is it so hard for me to believe the average Jane won’t like the real me that I can put in my books? Or more to the point, why am I putting that same “maybe they won’t like you” personality cap on my characters?

The fact is it circles right back to me. I give every character a piece of myself. Sooner or later those pieces could probably make up Melissa.  Talk about a writing block inducing fear.

But, ya know, I’m going to tell myself no one will ever read this book, so who gives a flying fig. Probably will end up being the best book I’ve written. Might be the worse, but it’s the leap of faith that matters the most here.

Have you taken a leap of faith lately?

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Tapping Into That Honest Part of Me, part II An 11 Day Break and I’m Already a Wimp

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