It’s Official, The World Is Coming to An End

December 24, 2008 at 4:49 am 8 comments

I’m not sure if you know this about me, but I’m a Preacher’s Kid. My father is currently a pastor of a small church. My mother could probably quote the entire Bible without checking once.

So, growing up I’ve heard this quite often. The weather would be strange and the world most definitely will be coming to an end. The economy is doing bad and the world must be coming to the end. A transvestite would walk by and the world is coming to an end. I never believed these dire warnings. I’m probably not the biggest cynic, but I’d be a close runner up. Meteors would have to be falling out the sky, a plague of locust would have to descend on my fair city and a transvestite would have to be walking by for me to believe this at one point in time in my life.

But tonight folks this is the second time this year I have donned the apron I bought because it matched my kitchen set. For Thanksgiving I put it on to wrestle an 18-pound turkey–my first. Again I’m wearing it to make a Lemon Ice Box Pie. I have another turkey in my freezer that I plan to make with macaroni, green beans, corn bread, boiled potatoes and Sparkling Cider on Christmas Day.

The world is definitely coming to an end.

I never cook. Never saw the reason why while my mother slaved, beautifully in the kitchen. But that woman now resides in North Carolina, leaving me and my children to starve on holidays. It had to be done to perserve my sanity–and my appetite. I decorated for Christmas. I played Christmas music without a gun being put to my head. You should go buy water and canned goods ’cause seriously The World Is Coming To An End.

That is all.

Happy Holidays.

AMENDED TO ADD: Never post while under the influence of condensed milk and apron wearing. My mother doesn’t cook beautifully in a chicken, but a kitchen.

Now that is truly all for now.


Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

While Cleaning, I Found Jimmy Hoffa Santa Is On My Hit List

8 Comments Add your own

  • 1. coffeegirl88  |  December 24, 2008 at 4:58 am

    Can I come to your house for Christmas dinner? Meal sounds pretty good to me. And I promise, I’ll leave the -2 weather here in NY. Maybe.

    And no, the world is not coming to an end. Even the least domestic of us occassionally get a small fever and get the idea to be Martha Stewart for a day. Don’t worry, it passes and usually leaves no side effects.

  • 2. Melissa Blue  |  December 24, 2008 at 5:31 am

    Yes, ma’am. You are cordially invited to the Blue Resident’s Christmas Dinner. Of course if you can make from NY to California in time and with enough cash stashed away. Please do not bring NY weather with you. I just want it cold enough to snow for an hour here. That’s all I need.

    As for the world is ending…well, my religious roots are showing.

  • 3. Jennifer McKenzie  |  December 24, 2008 at 5:33 am

    *buying big jugs of bottled water*
    I’m ready.

  • 4. edie17  |  December 24, 2008 at 5:33 am

    LOL Your meal sounds great!

    And your lines on Karin’s contest are pretty good too!

  • 5. Melissa Blue  |  December 24, 2008 at 5:45 am

    Thanks, Edie. Those aren’t the lines that are in the book. Last minute I change them to make them better. If nothing else I now know how to edit my stories. “If all I had were my next lines to get me published…” Yeah, I’m nervous, but excited to see if I make it to the next week.

    And, seriously, you can come over too.

  • 6. coffeegirl88  |  December 24, 2008 at 4:40 pm

    Thank you for the invite, I suspect I’ll be thinking of it often tonight as I suffer through the Christmas Eve dinner cooked by my crazy cousin. I fear what dinner will look like, let alone taste like.

    Merry Christmas!

  • 7. pamwritesromance  |  December 24, 2008 at 7:32 pm

    PK–that explains a lot!

    And Happy Holidays to you and yours, babe. May 2009 rock!

  • 8. Raine  |  December 24, 2008 at 9:21 pm

    Necessity is the mother of evil, lol.

    You’re a baby. In a few years, you won’t be able to remember when you DIDN’T cook and celebrate the holidays (or you’ll be a stinking rich author who pays others to do it for you). 😉

    Wishing you and the kids a very Merry Christmas, Mel!

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