MOTHERHOOD AND NATIONAL’S

July 18, 2008 at 1:35 pm 10 comments

Trust me these two are related if you have kiddos. Now my children are young. 8 and 3. For some reason when I’m not in their vicinity they need to know where I am. They love me and I won’t question it. I know one day they’ll be like “Mom, why don’t you go somewhere?” So, they can throw that wild party while I’m gone. I’ll cherish these moments when they want me around. My ego grows when they start the pointless argument, “No, she’s MINE!”

To a certain extent.

Now you should see where I’m leading with this. National’s would not be the same with the kids in tow. TRUST ME!!!! Yes, I can balance it throughout the year when I have to carve out time to write, edit, and promote. But National’s is Mommy Time. Which means I’ll be leaving my kids behind with someone who has NO IDEA what my kids are like when I’m not around to tame them.

Thank you, MOM. You are sooooo getting another book dedicated to you.

Last year I spent six days away from my kids. When I got home they were the first people I wanted to see. My dad was trying to chat me up and I wanted to say, “We can talk later. My mother instincts are calling me. Kind of like when I needed to push. An instinct so strong that the doctors know when to step back and just try to catch the baby. I have to see my kids NOW.”

Yes, I talked to them during the days I was gone. I had the five seconds of mourning after each call. “Oh, I miss my babies.” And then I would turn around to party some more. It’s a crazy balance, I won’t deny it.

This year I’ll only be gone four days, but I’m expecting my mother to be duct taped and stuff in a closet some where. This year they know when I say “Mommy’s going to National’s” I will be gone for a long and unnecessary time. Even though I’m leaving at five in the morning I expect angst, tears, and even kids wrapped around my ankles screaming, “NOOOO!!!!MOMMY DON’T LEAVE US!!!!!NOOO!!!”

My heart will wrench. I’ll hate myself. I’ll feel like a horrible mother for doing this to my kids. For all you mothers out there going to National’s, this feeling is okay. Your kids will survive this extended vacation without you. Yes, of course, you will feel the occasional pangs of guilt. You will miss them. Once you get back they will be the first people you want to see. They will use the puppy dog eyes to get everything they want because YOU LEFT THEM. This is a natural process. And, really, really trust me the guilt will be hovering.

GET OVER IT! Now if you are hit with this during National’s call them or come meet me in the bar. I’ll be the one with the silver flask dancing on the bar top. Because again, National’s is Mommy Time.

Call me a bad mother in the comments or we can make an offical date to meet in the bar. Really, it’s up to you.

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Entry filed under: kids, RWA conference.

NOTEBOOK VS. COMPUTER MAKING LEMONADE FROM LEMONS

10 Comments Add your own

  • 1. raine  |  July 18, 2008 at 10:24 pm

    If I were going, we’d definitely meet up and toss back a few. Maybe convince you to stay another day. 😉
    Have fun, girl!

  • 2. Melissa Blue  |  July 19, 2008 at 2:44 am

    I will. Less than two more weeks.

  • 3. Edie  |  July 19, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    You’re not a bad mother at all. My CP left her two small kids at home with her mother last year and traveled from South Africa to England to Dallas. It was worth it for her.

    You have the right idea, enjoy every moment. You deserve it. I wish I were going so I could meet you.

  • 4. Melissa Blue  |  July 19, 2008 at 7:47 pm

    I wish the same. I met so many people in the past year it’s insane and I want to meet them all. (Well, except for the real, real crazy ones. )

  • 5. Shelley Munro  |  July 19, 2008 at 10:40 pm

    Melissa – I don’t have kids so it’s not as bad for me, but I will miss my little dog since I spend a lot of time with her. Somehow, I don’t think it’s quite the same! I’ll watch for you dancing on the bar. 😉

  • 6. Melissa Blue  |  July 19, 2008 at 10:57 pm

    Someone will be missing you while you are gone. But, yeah, I don’t think your dog can say, “Why are you leaving me? NOOOOO!!!!”

    And, yeah, on the bar is where I’ll be.

  • 7. Anne, writing as TCMaine  |  July 20, 2008 at 5:02 pm

    Who you calling crazy? *Sniff* I’m just a vulnerable, misunderstood vampire. 😉 Seriously though, you must be going out of your mind with excitement from your up-and-coming trip to Nationals. I can’t wait to see pictures!

  • 8. Melissa Blue  |  July 20, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    When did I call ya crazy?

    Anyway, I’ve now hit the weird time where I really, really, don’t want to go to National’s. I felt this last year. It’s a weird feeling. Not sure if it’s fear of shoving my foot down my mouth or what. It passes and then I’m excited all over again.

    Hmm, something to post about.

  • 9. Anne, writing as TCMaine  |  July 20, 2008 at 7:36 pm

    Oh, I’m just kidding. A couple of replys up, you mentioned (paraphrasing) that you’ve met a lot of people that you’d like to meet…at nationals, except for the crazy ones…again, paraphrashing. Since you write sexy love stories and I don’t, I thought that I might be in the crazy catagory since I want to write vampire stories, but I really didn’t mean it as harshly at it sounded. I was just teasing. I don’t know you but reading your blog as often as I do, it seems like I know you. I know this is a myth…It’s an interesting phenomenon when bloggers read someone’s blog over a period of time, they feel like best friends. -BB4ever, right? Again, just teasing. -Honest, I’m not crazy; I’m just a school teacher…okay, maybe I am crazy. I mean; who would voluntarily spend their days with a pack of twelve-year-olds. -Let’s just keep that last bit between us, shall we. 🙂

  • 10. Melissa Blue  |  July 20, 2008 at 7:54 pm

    Um, all those hormones…Wow, you are a brave woman. I plan to ship my daughter off to boarding school when she hits that age.

    And crazy people are the ones who don’t know they are crazy. So, Honest, I’m not crazy; I’m just a school teacher…okay, maybe I am crazy.

    This alone tells me you aren’t. Plus, I went to National’s last year. They are way too many writers out there with a few nuts and bolts missing.

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