CONFESSIONS OF A ROMANCE AUTHOR: part whatever

May 3, 2008 at 6:14 am 24 comments

It has been two months since I last confessed…

Today I’m not going to talk about things in books that makes my eye twitch. I’m going to talk to you folks about a very serious issue. I’m going to talk about my addiction. I’m so ashamed to admit this to you guys. But I really feel this post just might help someone who like me…is addicted to the Internet.

Yes, I know, shocking. But see it started innocent enough. I used dial up—which I’ve now learned is a gateway to worse things, things that any human should never stoop to—I’d check my e-mails. I’d do research for my book. Then I started to frequent this popular forum called The Cherries. They’d post topics and leave links. I knew better. I’ve…heard about how one link can lead to another, but it was just so tempting to see the hoopla of LOLcats. And then I did something that I now regret.

I upgraded to DSL.

I’m sorry I need a moment….

Things start to blur at this point. I could now watch videos on Youtube. I could, I’m so shamed to say it…Blog hop. Yes, I know. I feel dirty at how many blogs I left comments on and never returned to. Okay, okay, I was being promiscuous. I’d been burned so badly by dial-up I had to find a way to comfort myself. Those long wait times to upload pages that only left me with “error on page” messages. I needed something to help me forget those dark and horrid days.

I digress.

And then I started my own blog. I built up a clientèle and started to push my own rambling thoughts to others. I referred those poor innocent people to my blog roll that would only introduce them to the same addictive behavior I’d learn to love and hate.

These past few days have been enlightening for me. I didn’t have 24 hour access. I couldn’t leave fly by night comments. I couldn’t…link in. I started to have withdrawals.

But when I offered my neighbor to have their way with me just for an hour of their bandwidth, I knew I’d hit rock bottom. I was a NetHead of the worse kind. I could see myself tap dancing on the corner to scrounge up enough change to pay my monthly bill. I saw myself doing unspeakable things to my modem just to get it to connect. I didn’t want to be that person.

But today folks I’m here to tell you that it’s not worth it. Don’t be like me, a NetHead. Oh, dear baby jesus, I’m a NETHEAD. You can stop the addiction now. Don’t be peer pressured to click that link. I’ll have to live with what I did for a bandwidth. You don’t.

sigh

Hi, my is Melissa, and I’m addicted to the Internet.

To find out more information on Crystal Net check out the archives.

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Entry filed under: confessions, snort worthy.

LIFE AFTER DEADLINE SINCE THERE IS NO WAY I CAN TOP FRIDAY’S FUNNY

24 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Janice  |  May 3, 2008 at 6:40 am

    If your addicted then so am I.

    I confess to no less then seven–yes count them seven blogs. *sob*

    But I have old dial up server, so I’m up very late every stinking night!

  • 2. Marianne Arkins  |  May 3, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    You and me, both!! LOL… I get the shakes if I can’t get online. It’s a sickness.

  • 3. Edie  |  May 3, 2008 at 12:56 pm

    I’m addicted too. For a couple weeks, I had a set number of pages to write before I even looked at my email. It stopped when I decided to write another book and had to plot it. I need to get back into the routine.

  • 4. Amie Stuart  |  May 3, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    *HOWLING*

    This is HYSTERICAL–mostly because I can relate. Once I get home I’m not online a lot but if the internet is down, I’m like a crackhead looking for my next fix *sigh*

  • 5. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    7 blogs? Oh, my.

  • 6. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    Marianne-It really is. I started to realize how much I use the internet when I get home, when all I had was access to my aol and yahoo on my phone. I was dying a slow death.

  • 7. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 2:02 pm

    Edie-I did end up writig a WHOLE lot more these past few days. So, I totally see the benefits.

  • 8. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 2:03 pm

    I’m like a crackhead looking for my next fix *sigh*

    Why do you think I call it Crystal Net? This stuff is addictive. Lol.

  • 9. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 2:11 pm

    Hold on, wait a minute…aren’t you in deadline hell? Why are you on the Crystal Net?

  • 10. Jess  |  May 3, 2008 at 3:27 pm

    LOL Mel, this is brilliantly written, I just want you to know that. You keep the metaphor going so well!! Fantastic.

    And I’m a recovering Nethead, I am proud to announce. Notice on my blog I only post four times a week, I cut back on my own blogroll, I dropped all forums except Cherries… I’m … trying. It’s hard. But I’m getting a HECK of a lot more writing done, so it’s totally worth it.

  • 11. Caryn  |  May 3, 2008 at 3:28 pm

    That’s hilarious, adn so well said! I have the same problem. It’s embarrassing, really, but if you admit it to fellow bloggers, you could get a support group together in no time.

    By the way, Firefox refuses to resize my window, so I can see less than half of what I’m typing, so I hope there aren’t too many errors. (Of course, not that such difficulties have kept me from blog-hopping and commenting!)

  • 12. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 3:52 pm

    Jess, I’m envious. The Net has such a strong hold on me at the moment. Could be I’ve been without for a period of time and have to make up.

    But I think I’m going to cut back, too. Someone gave me a computer. I’ve made sure it doesn’t have internet access and when it’s my writing time I’ll use that one. It’s sad to say I can’t trust myself when I have internet connection.

    But since I work in substance abuse I can say, “admitting you have a problem is the first step.”

  • 13. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 3:53 pm

    Nope, only one mishap in your comment. I have a full screen so I have no excuse, so I don’t hold it against ya.

    And yeah, if I get enough people I can start a support group and probably blog about it…:)

  • 14. raine  |  May 3, 2008 at 4:23 pm

    Slut.

    (Raine, who’s still mired–er, pure of heart with the limitations of dialup). 😉

  • 15. Mel  |  May 3, 2008 at 4:33 pm

    (Raine, who’s still mired–er, pure of heart with the limitations of dialup). 😉

    Yes, Raine you are as pure as driven snow. (Well, snow well driven over…)

    And how do you think I found your blog? I had a one night stand with it, but I kept coming back. I think we (me and your blog)are on the brink of a full fledge relationship. I can’t tell it I see other blogs on the side. It thinks we are in an exclusive relationship. See that’s what I’m talking about. The Net is a where you lose all inhibitions and morals.

    Okay, I’m done with analogies, now. Must…go…surf…

  • 16. raine  |  May 3, 2008 at 11:06 pm

    😀

  • 17. Marilyn Brant  |  May 3, 2008 at 11:16 pm

    Mel,
    First of all–thank you!!! I’m so glad you stopped by my blog and I appreciate the congrats. Cherries are the best :). Second, I JUST got DSL a few months ago and OMG!! The YouTube viewing alone has me up until 2 or 3am some nights! So, I can totally relate…

  • 18. Mel  |  May 4, 2008 at 2:01 am

    Marilyn when I first discovered YouTube I lost my mind. I would watch old performances of artist I liked. Then my favorite comics. Then Actor’s Studio. Well, you get the point.

  • 19. Toni Anderson  |  May 4, 2008 at 4:26 pm

    Hi Mel, I followed links from TWRP. I too am addicted to the internet. Very sad but true. 🙂

  • 20. Mel  |  May 5, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    Toni-Welcome to the club of NetHeads. You’re in great company.

  • 21. Amie Stuart  |  May 5, 2008 at 2:23 pm

    Raine the Puritan strikes again!!! hehe

    Yeah well even on Deadline Island we have high speed internet 😉

  • 22. Ilana  |  May 5, 2008 at 3:54 pm

    LOL!
    I’m late to the post, but so glad I stopped by – very funny.

    My husband is addicted to YouTube…
    Guess I’d better stay away from it.

  • 23. Mel  |  May 5, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    Amie-High Speed is a gift from the writing Gods. Do not question it even while on Deadline Island.
    *snort*

  • 24. Mel  |  May 5, 2008 at 4:05 pm

    YouTube is the most addictive thing out there. It just doesn’t affect writers. It’s addictive to everyone. I’m sure if I was to do a worldwide poll on how many hours a person has spent (wasted) on YouTube it’ll blow our minds.

    But I’ve been meaning to check out…lol.

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